12 August 2007

Being Gay (1) by Albert Buhagiar (Times of Malta, August 11, 2007)

I agree with Jacqueline Calleja (Sexual Complementarity, July 31).

In the eyes of the Church, gay people are not sexually complementary because sex between two men or two women cannot produce babies.

Actually, sex between a heterosexual couple is also unacceptable unless it happens within the holy sacrament of marriage and for the purpose of reproduction.
As mechanical as that may sound, the point is gay people at large do

not fit into the Church's definition of marriage as it requires a couple to get married with the prime intent of having as many children as possible.

Ms Calleja's letter misses one crucial point, however. I have never asked for gay marriage within the Church.

The Church excludes openly gay people in many ways. Gay people are discouraged from becoming priests and nuns, gay couples are not allowed to get married, and homosexuality has often been described as immoral, evil, and, quoting the Bible, an abomination.

Before receiving Communion, a gay person is required to confess and redeem. But honestly, how can I redeem, when I love that person I have just made love to?

The Church has always been an exclusive club, and I am perfectly happy to not be a part of it. I excluded the Church as soon as I realised that it was excluding me.

I know I will never be able to change the Church's way of thinking, and quite frankly, I do not feel it is my responsibility. But I will not accept someone telling me that I cannot be with the man I love by quoting the Church's definition of marriage.

I am not even going to comment on Ms Calleja's theory of two sockets or two plugs - that's physics not human behaviour. But I cannot help pondering on the idea of the gay village.
Ms Calleja naïvely hypothesises that a gay village would eventually become deserted. Here she misses yet another point: Heterosexual couples will keep producing gay and lesbian people in other villages to keep the gay village thriving, because gay people are a natural occurrence within the norm of the human species. The vast majority of gay people are children of heterosexual couples of course!

I do not care if Ms Calleja does not view gay marriage and heterosexual marriage as having the same value. But I am severely disgusted at any government that makes that same mistake - especially when its reasoning has a purely religious foundation.

It has been said so many times, in so many different ways, so I will not even try to say it in a unique way: Keep the Church and the State separate.

And on that note, let me finish off by saying this, also for the nth time: It is not the sacrament that same-sex couples are after, but outright laws that protect their union.

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